Tuesday, February 14, 2006
When I started The Pragmatician, no one was reading it, at the very least nobody let me know they were reading my posts. So I have no qualms about recycling an old post today. Why today you ask? Read and you’ll find out.
It was originally posted in August of 2005
JEWISH VALENTINE
As if it wasn’t bad enough that music is prohibited during the three weeks from Sunday on, it is meat’s turn to become the forbidden fruit.I won’t get into how excessively hard this is for me, for fear of repeating myself.
These are positively the hardest times of the year, almost no simchas take place, and even Bar Mitzvahs are sad affairs with the real celebration taking place sometime after Tisha Be’Av.
Luckily after these trying weeks, it’s vacation time. And about a week after fasting, it’s Tu Be’Av a.k.a. Yom Ahavah, which seems to be a vague equivalent of valentine’s day.Yep for those who are surprised even valentine’s day is inspired from something Jewish. (Like everything else)
This concept dates back to the times of Shaul Hamelech.(or Shloime not sure now).It was the custom on that day to let the unmarried women run loose and for bachelors to go and grab the girl who pleased him the most.It’s actually mentioned in the Gemarah(Talmud, Taanit 31a).
“The daughters of Jerusalem would go out... and dance in the vineyards" and "whoever did not have a wife would go there".
It is considered a very joyous day and despite it’s obscurity a very spiritual and important one.The actual relative significance of the day can better be understood by means of this quote in the last Mishnah of Masechet Taanit.
“Rabi Shimon ben Gamliel said "Israel has no days as festive as the 15th of Av and Yom Kippur”
Just as on Tisha Be’Av a number of unfortunate events came over the Jews at different times and places so too a number of auspicious events happened on Tu Be’Av.
- The victory of the Pharisees over the Sadducees was on either 14 or 15 Av.
- The different tribes were allowed to intermarry on this date.
- Members of the excommunicated tribe of Benjamin were allowed to appear in the community.
- The end of the death of the Exodus generation in Midbar Sinai, which was their punishment for believing the 10 spies' negative report on the land of Canaan.
- King Hosea, last monarch of the northern Israelite kingdom removed the barriers installed by King Jeroboam the 1st which prevented the northerners making pilgrimages to Jerusalem (Melachims 1 12:29, Melachims 2 18:4).
- The date when the Romans permitted the Jews to bury Bar Kochba's supporters who had fallen at Beitar.
It is great to know that when the three weeks are over there’s a day like that coming up.Just to lift our spirits and remind us that being Jewish isn’t all about sadness and mourning it’s equally about celebration, joy and simchas of all kinds.I remain with one question; my wife pressured me to make an effort last valentine. Although I wasn’t enthusiastic about participating in a non-Jewish holiday, I caved in and bought her a nice gift, which I otherwise wouldn’t have for no particular occasion. Now on Yom Ahavah which is a Jewish festivity, am I supposed to ‘make an effort‘ again?
Information about TU Be'Av gathered from general knowledge and
Torah Tots,Zipple,Chabad Magazine
And too bad in days of old that the unmarried girls couldn't run around and pick the unmarried bachelor that pleased them most!!
Did you cave this year and get your wife a gift? I hope so!
I like the twist.
Can you just imagine what today's roshei yeshivos would say if we attempted to re-institute these tu b'av practices?
I love the idea of yom ahava
b'ahava ann xxxxx
I pouted a bit when i read these words in your post..."valentine’s day is inspired from something Jewish. (Like everything else)"
As a Greek, i just can't swallow this!!!! he he
Stacey-Yeah I did, what’s a little money spent compared to your loved ones big smile :)
A frum- Glad you liked this post, back then (august) I barely got a comment on it.
Better not imagine it too loud, it could get ugly.
Hannala- It’s awhile from now, more like July I think, but I’ll post a warning a few days ahead on this blog.
If I remember then!
Evangelia- She is, and yeah I got her something cute and quite expensive.
I know little about Greek culture but I’ve seen the movie My Big ft Greek Wedding an the subsequent television series My big fat Greek life and while I know movies always exaggerate facts it did give me some insight.
It’s true Greeks have some lovely traditions and I can’t deny that we have some stuff in common, like the overbearing but loving families : )
Frumgirl- It would be too expensive on men!
MBS- I agree that everyday one should show love and appreciation for those we love and care about, not only on commercially designate days.
it's like in school one of my teachers came in on Mother's Day saying that every day should be Mother's Day.
So I guess the important thing to take from these days is to take that effort, that sense of special occasion and joy and celebration extend throughout the year somehow (other than our numerous chagim!). Doesn't have to be anything big or grand, it's the small actions and words and gifts which can sometimes make a persons day just as much, or even more than an expensive gift that one may feel pressured to give because of a tacky overcommercialised hallmark holiday.
I've seen that even a simple text message can be a sign of love and/or affection.
But joking aside I understand what you’re saying, show the ones your care about them everyday that you do.
Datingmaster- I recognized the mother as the one who was playing Fran’s aunt
on The Nanny, but none of the others in the cast.
Rebecca- long ago, long ago
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